the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
He had one of those small greek statue penises
You were so drunk you tried to sell your salsa to everyone on the restaurant.
The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
so i gave him head in the movie theater last night. thought we were alone til I heard the clapping from the other side of the theater after he'd finished.
It's only 4 pm and I'm already way past my preferred quota of "could have died" moments
we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
Also, never say you're cool with a threesome if they ask. That shit's a trap.
Dude this breakup has officially hit rock bottom. sitting around watching women's NCAA basketball instead of going out
My neighbor caught me peeing on his rose bushes at 2 in the morning while wearing my Santa hat. My sex appeal has never been higher.
I seriously think my heart may fail. And I didn't even grab a toilet beer :(
He just started dry humping the air... I'm done
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
Randomize
