Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
We need to stop celebrating holidays that dont belong to us
I'm pretty sure I got a cavity today due to how many times I've puked hungover at work.
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
I just messaged a senior at Harvard and told him to 'tinder me softly'
Stoned in some guys basement listening to ELO. it's like its 1978.
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
She walked out and announced that he was now part of our confused, incestuous, glorious eskimo family. I've never been more proud.
Campus is too small for this to keep happening
if you come you're not allowed to wear pants. if you arrive wearing pants you won't be wearing them long.
He was super adorable, like I wanna pinch his cheeks while I fuck him...
In other news, Justin Bieber has a big dick and that makes me uncomfortable.
You're the best thing in my life, followed closely by cannabis and trashy romance novels
Dude, he came to our house with a beer can in his hand dressed up in a chicken suit screaming, "free eggs!" then threw up and passed out in the front yard.
Randomize
