He passed out while I was riding him, and just when I was about to call it quits he opens his eyes and squeezes my boobs and goes Honk! Honk!
Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.
I think I'm making progress on my commitment issues. I drunk made out with the same guy from last semester this weekend.
do you actually have a paper bowl full of broken glass and ecstasy or was that just a dream?
some asshole was waslkibg around with ab electric razor and shaving parts of peoples heads.
True. On an unrelated note I helped post bail for both of our ex girlfriends last night. Russian roulette: guess which one is pregnant?
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
My walk of shame this morning would have been much less obvious if it hadn't been 6:30 in the morning and I wasn't walking through downtown Nashville in a Steeler jersey.
I honestly feel really bad for any girl with a period that lasts more than a day
Everything about that text makes me want to throttle you and cry
Judging by your snapchat you're totally working on your project and definitely not singing, "The Sign" while shirtless with another man.
One of my favorite March activities is cropdusting people while wearing a kilt.
We found you with your penis in the vacum hose crying softly...
I’m not sure she knows my name. She introduced me as “the fuck toy”
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