But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
you know its a sad night when you can actually see and hear sitcoms on at the bar
Turned out not to be so bad. He had a big dick and i owed him for all the free beer over the year.
I need to stop drinking and eating and start working out. I look like the lovechild of John Goodman and Jabba the Hutt.
I am not exagerating when I say the thought "screw you future me" actually just went through my head
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
Dude, I woke up with wet dollar bills in my boxers where did you take me???
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
Don't come back. They don't have pants.
Oh god.
God has nothing to do with this.
I get so sad when I watch him slowly destroy his life with whiskey and cocaine. Then he bites my neck and I just want to fuck him. I can't help it.
I'm sorry I crashed your motorcycle and watched you get robbed from a rooftop. Will you please come back or at least drop off my shoes?
I'm not saying I'm planning to hook up tomorrow but I'm also not saying I'm unprepared for it
Randomize
