i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
I can't really talk right now. I'm getting on a plane to Oregon to go give a guy a bj. I'll see you in three days.
Im positive, your name was on my abdomen, Im pretty sure thats solid evidence
It's ok. I will share any beautiful men that I drug and leave unconscious on my bed. I'm that kind of friend.
He said, "cum on daddy's dick!" ... I pictured my dad. That just scarred me for life.
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
was I really that bad?
you army crawled across the kitchen floor, turned the cat into "super kitty" and crawled into the dog cage
So he drunk messaged me last night telling me he wants a baby. Think I should call his bluff?
Yep if he's taking selfies he's probably on drugs again.
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
See, this is why you don't do nice things for people. You'll get stuck in the snow and you won't catch a dick.
The bouncers found you passed out on the toilet. They tried to move you but you refused and repeatedly shouted that you wanted to go out like Elvis.
Yep. Just fucked a 34 year old on the football field where we both went to high school. That's a story for the grandkids.
Randomize
