Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
Just pissed in my own closet. Had no idea adult dinner parties could he so awesome.
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
I'm high and craving hash browns from McDonalds. Please pick me up. I also would like a hug and a supportive pat on the back when you get here. Thanks.
Its two in the afternoon. McDonalds don't sell hash browns at 2 in the afternoon. Whore. The hug I can provide however.
If he can forgive your lousy blowjobs, you can ignore his terrible driving.
Wait does semen show up on blood tests?
Logically he should not be walking around...after that fall he should be in a hospital in a medically induced coma
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
We need to get fucked up again and play games like "save the tequila but dodge the knife"
Why did I ever allow that penis to enter my sacred temple?
I asked him if we were going to get arrested for doing it in the bar parking lot. "Absolutly not" said the guy getting the blow job...
How do you teach a grown ass men how to fuck? Why is good sex so hard to find these days?
My theory is if i keep drinking, evolution will kick in and I will grow a bigger, faster, and more improved liver by January.
Randomize
