just got waxed at a place I havent been to in a while
woman didnt remember me then in the middle of waxing she announced that she just didnt recognize my face
Things to remember: Girls don't appreciate it when you yell "Beast Mode!" when switching to doggy style.
An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.
I told my boyfriend my favorite food was strawberry poptarts, now my email inbox is getting spammed with nude pics of him with his dick in a poptart box..
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
I don't have any money, so I'm just gonna press my boobs against him for his birthday.
Big girls don't cry they get day drunk
Will the fact that I have 4 boob hickies add to or take away from tonight's outfit?
I woke up to the sound of him repeatedly tapping out SOS in Morse Code using his hard cock.
But I don't wanna live with them bc I need to be able to walk around naked and sex on any surface guilt free.
I just ate your leftovers whilst watching Garfield and Friends. Thank you across the board.
I'm officially disproving the fact that a hoe never gets cold bc this hoe is COLD.
ICE CREAM AND CAKE BITCHESSSSSS
She used a candle as a shot glass.. A FUCKING CANDLE BRO!!
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