I just watched a trucker jack off to a picture of Ellen DeGeneres at a truck stop in Nebraska.
wait so...it's like an actual thing to masturbate using the detachable shower head? WTF I thought I was being creative!
All i learned in high school was how to sell drugs
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
I wish my dick could take responsibilities for his own actions
I started dry heaving in the middle of sex and she says "You moan funny."
maybe next time you shouldn't be drinking alone watching intervention at 3 am and no one would think you needed an intervention.
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
Get your ass over here, we're drinking Patron and watching My Little Pony. Patron and Ponies, do you copy?!
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
I'm on the fast track to lesbian land
He just brought a live lobster to the party.
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
I can't imagine a friend I would rather lose my virginity to in a threesome.
Randomize
