I twisted my ankle last night doing a super high five with 3 inch heels on.
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
I won't be able to make it. Too hung over. Can't hold down fluids. I'm in the bathtub trying to hydrate my body through osmosis. And yes, Tequila Tuesday is totally still on for tonight.
I am just pathetic enough to be sitting on the couch with my cat drinking absinthe and vodka watching moulin rouge. Hello, tuesday night.
Did you know that scruff feels epic on boobs especially when they are covered in whip cream?
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
I went to the bathroom, came back, and my friend was sleeping leaning up against the stripper pole.
I guess I just stopped wanting to rip his balls out and started being okay with him being alive. that's a typical feeling for exes right?
I could be busy drinking my face off and getting red white and bruised per usual
It was just a Craigslist hook up but she wore sweats. Where are the girls with class?
So it was all good until she started grabbing my beard and telling me to "roar little lion"
I tipped him really well because I feel he knew we were high, but did it in a non judgemental way.
He was feeling me up but acting like he was asleep. Like WTF does that mean??
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
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