It made me feel like I need a reality show of my life so I could go back and watch the episodes to figure out how I got from the trunk of the car to my neighbors tree house...
I'm 99% sure that for 3 hours I thought you were British. We must smoke that again.
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
If someone cleans their bathroom and shaves their crotch for you you kinda have to admit the relationship to facebook
What's a nice way of saying "You fell asleep, and I got bored, so I made out with your brother"?
Tip of the day: Don't ever send a bootycxall at 3 in aftnoon. No one will respond n u'll just feel fooolish.
This is what happens when you live with someone you met on Grindr
I'd rather be sodomized with a fullly decorated Christmas tree.
for me, it's working out the tricky timing of the Viagra and nightly laxative.
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
YOU CANT JUST BLOW GUYS BC THEY’RE NICE TO YOU LEXI
I CAN IF I WANT TO
last night someone said that theyd like to do drugs with a dolphin ... judging from the diagram on the wall we figured it out.
all we need now is a dolphin ... and some drugs.
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
Bahahah I should. I’m the free range drunk girl who should clearly not be free range because who knows what kind of fuckery I would get into
Randomize
