you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
You told my mother that her salad dressing tasted like semen.
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
he gave me a new purse full of weed and five boxes of samoas for my birthday. best boyfriend ever.
I have reached the point in my life where I realized this is what I'm going to do for the rest of my life. Eat, shit , bar, drink, drank, drunk.
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
Just witnessed a fat waitress doing whipits in the back of a waffle house.. my life seems a little brighter..
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
I just want to be able to run around naked and eat grass with no judgments and have people feed me and expect me to sleep all the time.
I'm so high. Midnight pancake breakfast in bed
How do we stop her downward spiral?
Wine. For us.
You have the most beautiful penis I've ever seen. I never thought penises were meant to be beautiful, but you proved me wrong
Sex. Target parking lot. I really am the mayor.
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
Randomize
