There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
sooo my mom just yelled up the stairs " you left your bowl down by the computer"....aaand for a second I forgot cereal bowls still existed
I have diapers under my sink. trying to convince myself to use them.
The only requirement is that his name is Kevin... All other factors don't matter to drunk me. Drunk me likey Kevins.
How do people deal with hangovers? I literally want to eat my own face.
Last time I heard from you, you were double fisting strawberry milk and wine. Answer this text so I know you're still alive. Bonus points for a coherent answer.
Are we doing anything tonight after class for Valentine's Day or just being lazy and having sex?
If you expect me to say anything other than 'lazy and sex' you're crazzzzy!
How can I not totally like a guy that told me my boobs were too big for me to be taught how to play golf?
I had a 10 minute conversation with the refrigerator, it was telling me how it likes to be opened and closed. Ecstasy, I love you.
I know he's not here, but I can still see him. I found some of my old stash and its good shit so its expected to see sunlight at night and scary llama men. Midgets or otherwise.
He stopped mid sex to pour wine in my mouth...
Marry him.
Drunk me left sober me a shower beer in expectation of Hurricane Harvey. Drunk me is the best.
Everything is fine, it's not hung over in here at all\n\n*Narrator* *but in fact everything was not fine*
Randomize
