he cried for an hour, then he threw up on my lap then started singing party in the usa...opera style...
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
...just for future reference, one Four Loko can fits PERFECTLY in a venti iced coffee cup from Starbucks
have the fact that the early bird is danced upon by the prettiest strippers be your motivation
You may or may not have poured bacon fat down her shirt
Did you ask me to bring you a t-shirt to class or did I just dream that?
No, I did. It's a long story.
I will not be a drunk bitch. I will not be a drunk bitch. Chanting this until it's second nature.
Drinking in moderation can be fun. Drinking in moderation can be fun. Chanting this until it becomes true.
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
She just shoved like three McNuggets in her mouth and started sobbing and I have no idea what's going on.
Tequila Tuesdays need to not carry on throughout the week. Having a sad Saturday
Emoji's do wonders when you actually have nothing at all to say..
And then he dove into my vagina like scrooge mcduck into a room of gold
I'm definitely not at Wal-Mart eating jalapeno poppers with an elevated blood alcohol content
Welp... sober this am and I still have a parrot.
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