Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
i have a girlfriend
if you're drunk do you have a girlfriend?
no
Im a photoshop master, i successfully reduced the size of the pupils of all the girls I made out last night with to prove they were not that drunk. So glad the camera goes home with me.
The only downside so far to having a guy roommate is that when he's doing a walmart run, I just can't bring myself to ask him to pick up a pregnancy test for me. I feel like that's just too much too soon.
I'd rather make snow angels in a pool of elephant shit.than sleep with him.
There's a bag in my room with garbage, a thong, fritos, and an electrical cord. I'm assuming it's yours
........yyyyyyeah that's me
you texted me "dude im face"
it sounded so right at the time
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
What kind of outfit says I totes want you to take me in the airplane bathroom?
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
When she sees your dick for the first time, tell her it glows blue when orcs are close
Can I come by? I want you to meet my squirrel
I DIDN'T WATCH THE PILLSBURY DOUGH BOY PORN!!!!
I was fingering her and they busted into my room demanding to know who the best running back was, before I could say anything she moaned and said "Barry Sanders"
...blackout vacation is awesome. Where did you end up? I think i'm in Miami.
Hospital.
Randomize
