Sorry I couldn't answer your call, I'm expecting a call from Chris Hansen.
I'm guessing you didn't end up going to the bar last night.
Nope. Ended up at what I believe was a slumber party down the street.
Iced coffee. Banana. Two dumps. Life is good.
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
every time you want to hook up with a guy who has a girl friend, i'll just give you a freshman
he just looked at me and whispered "these are my sea lions. my sea lions." and then went back to licking the mirror
i would one night stand the shit outta him
Just saw a guy walking down the street carrying a giant inflatable penis
Just arrived at our party
It's one of those things you just need to see in person at least once in your life. Like Niagara falls or some shit. His ass is the Niagara falls of asses
I will kick you in all of your body parts. All at once.
I told him i turn boys gay hoping that would scare him off. Finally i found a way to take advantage of my disability.
Try eating a sub blackout with your uncle. It's not easy ok
He suck his junk in my HALF BAKED. Ben & Jerry would totally disapprove. This is worse than sticky dick donut day.
It's National Whipped Cream Day, prep those nips
Can you see if my straightener is in your refrigerator?
Yes. Its here..
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