you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
I woke up with her little sister yelling "she's dead !!" from the bathroom doorway.
Hey I have your shoes. Do you remember shouting "Police brutality!" when the bouncer was kicking you out last night?
Cat. Why do you sit on things I need to use.
Because it is cat.
I'm working on a search warrant...can u pick up box of Chardonnay...I'll give u cash when u get here...
Yea... I love that ur a prosecutor and drink box wine
How many times have we said we'd stop taking Jell-O shots with strangers?
I have a bottle of vodka wrapped in a leg warmer in my purse. This is what it takes to get through Christmas with my family.
He sent me a snap of him eating a tamale shirtless. I think I might be in love.
LOCK HIM DOWN.
Do you want to go soon I'm overthinking life and my butthole again
Fuck you and your fucking taquito's.
I wanted to say, you're welcome for your orgasms, thanks for not returning the favor, Needledick
my morning attempts to try to have sex with him was interrupted by the passion of the christ parade going on outside my house
Every morning should start with 2 orgasms and a shoulder massage
The dog destroyed my vibrator and swallowed several pieces. Vet gave us a laxative so now I’m checking lots of dog shit and having no orgasms. Plus the cute vet knows I don’t get enough dick, so that’s just great
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