I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
i was watching iron chef and got motivated, so i made dinosaur chicken nuggets
It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
she was so hung over that i had to hold her hair while she puked in a trash can in the middle of the student center as new freshman and their parents walked by.
His roommate just snorted a line of Smirnoff off the desk. I could really fit in here.
He just showed up at my house and was like "have you seen an axe laying around?" he wasnt wearing any shoes.
Steaks?
It's Ash Wednesday.
If you really think that not eating meat on a weeknight is going to keep you out of hell, fine. Can I use that chimichurri you made?
I'm watching the Brazzers version of Mary Poppins and enjoying it. Volume on and all. 45 minutes.
wait did i hook up with someone in mcdonalds last night?
I just wanna inform you guys that the first pregnancy scare of 2016 is over...
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
You'll love it there. Trust me. Cheap tequila, pretentious beer, tall white guys who will treat you badly. Its got everything you like.
it's like that time i was drunk at relay for life. but with balloon animals...
He said it was the classiest hand job he ever had because my nails were painted red. We need to go to nicer bars from now on.
I'll bring spiced rum
I am not drinking that devil juice
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