so you know how i got laid the other night? well a condom just came out of me and i dont know whether to be grossed out or happy
i am grossed the fuck out
You would only drink if the space jam soundtrack was playing, you thought it was hilarious that before every shot you said "y'all ready for this".
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
I didn't think her British accent was real until I saw how fucked up her teeth were.
I'm pretty sure God is rooting for me with this two gf thing
she moved to the other side of town, do you realize how far i gotta walk to get a blow job???
90 In a 65. Talked my way out of it with the i have to poop story. i am the ticket jesus
that's what penises do
they tell lies.
This is going to be another afternoon spent getting drunk in the shower, isn't it?
I rode on his Vespa around Florence and fucked him in an empty train. It was like a way sluttier version of Lizzy McGuire
You know Im horny if Im walking around in my lingerie and sex robe. It's my field of dreams mentality. If I wear it, he will come.
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
You can not love someone based on who they were when they were 9. Does he know how many dicks I've sucked since then?
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
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