I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
You smell like a Billy Joel song
CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it
Take in how we used all the shot glasses in the bar in less than an hour
Yehhhaaww I'm way ahead of you. I'm gunna get her a card that says " I'm sorry your now ex boyfriend decided to upgrade"
Is it bad that I don't ask for names anymore? Just added "gold-chain-wearing hotel guy" to my list under "minivan 3way" and "funny-tasting gym guy."
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
Yeah, I've been trying to get him to eat healthier. Turns out he'll eat almost any fruit or vegetable as long I let him eat it off my body.
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
Give me a minute. I'm trying to buy moonshine from a railroad worker named "Cowboy."
Just broke my no shot rule again.. Made out with a stranger. That's 0 for 3 this month for the record
Come to this bar
But I'm full of food.
MAKE ME FULL OF YOUR DICK
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
As you were falling you yelled out, "save my burrito!" Priorities
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