To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
it was my 21st birthday. took an old mans walker so i could stay till last call. reasonable right?
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
Bring the cards this coming weekend. If I'm not here I died skydiving Friday
At what point lastnight did a lens fall out of my glasses and nobody tell me?
I feel my soul being ripped out of my eye sockets
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
okay we need to get tested.
no YOU need to get tested. I'm just going along for the ride.
Sorry, It's like OkCupid Olympics... categories: best sext, best dick pic, and most effort by ugly. You won gold in the last event if that makes you feel better.
I want you to get off the plane and get directly into my pants
Didn't have the heart to tell him that while he was eating my ass I was laughing, not moaning, into the pillow
Having sex with him is like eating mayo. Don't think about it, just do it. It's worth it.
If I stopped mid-sex because the guy was hung like a light switch, it doesn't count, does it? Like the five second rule.
Highlight your past hook-ups. You've been stabbed, shot at, run over, and chased down the road...no you can't bring new bar bitch over here!
Dude she has a friend!!!!
HANDS OFF UNTIL AFTER I DO BUTT STUFF WITH HIM.
Randomize
