in spanish class. the girl next to me asked what Galapagos were. i told her they were islands. now she thinks Galapagos means islands in spanish
She was so happy she found her sunglasses, that she blew me. Im now randomly hiding things of hers in hopes she'll find them and I'll get a repeat performance.
Um, yeah. You lit my birthday candles with a joint. Mom= not happy.
We ran out of ice cubes so I used ice cream. Everyone thought that was the plan all along. I just went with it.
im pretty sure the clearest way to say "dont worry, im not emotionally attached" was by sleeping with his roommate the next night
I just threw up every bad decision and it hurts
Trust me that one dick you don't want. It's like a whale... That's swam too many oceans...
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
Guys always stop talking to me right around the point that if they bought me food a couple times I would probably have sex with them.
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
I was just thinking about our drunk conversation about having sex with elephants the other night. Love you bud. Stay strong.
College has done two things for me. Given me the confidence to blow my nose in public and shit in public
You can not love someone based on who they were when they were 9. Does he know how many dicks I've sucked since then?
She forgot a bra so she just used seran wrap. The scary thing is, it worked.
We bird danced in front of the bird cages for 20 minutes. I think it was our way of being like fuck you guys you're in a cage and we're on summer break.
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