grilled cheese. we just shotgunned grilled cheese.
No one even knew you were hurt until we saw the multiple cuts to prove it, and when we asked what happened all you could say was "I fell out"
Btw sorry for throwing that bag of ice at your face lastnight....
Its really bad when you fall asleep at a stop light outside the hotel and you wake up to a small spanish limo driver knocking on your window to tell you it's a green light
Sometimes I wonder if my parents know that I mean horny when I say lonely.
That's the only definition of lonely that I know.
I left my pipe in my center console with a bowl packed when I took my car to the shop, and when I picked it up the weed had been smoked, but my oil change was only half price.
I think he's speaking German to me now
Nevermind, he's just drunk and not texting properly
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
No kiss but I got free McDonald's so at least we can focus on what is really important here
I can't hang out tomorrow. A boy wants to feed me ice cream and touch my boobs. Priorities.
A dick pic is not a proper way to say I'm sorry
oh, i solved that problem. i told him i wanted to steal my roommate's nephew. radio silence. haven't heard from him since.
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
Dude, they hit that lizard part of my brain that tells me to fuck people.
Preach sister.
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
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