I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
Id settle for living inside the pirates of the carribean ride.
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
I love her so much that if I could have sex with her I wouldn't cuz my dick would feel out of place in such a perfect body/vagina
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
Last night he tried to put me in their garbage can and then sprayed me with a fire extinguisher in their kitchen...that house is always interesting
I can always tell its time to do laundry when my vibrator doesn't stay covered up in my sock drawer.
I want to have a prehistoric party. By that, I mean I want to dress up as a dinosaur and get drunk. That's all I want in life.
The cops forgot your handle of tequila when they took you away. Taking shots in your honor amigo
I totally just friend requested the girl I met in jail last night so that I could give her back the sunglasses she lent me upon our release. See, I'm not a total delinquent.
Can I just put my face in your boobs and forget the world?
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
Our first time hooking up was on New Years and we've managed to hook up every holiday since, I'm hoping this lasts until 2016 just to fulfill my American Holiday sex fantasy I never knew I had
There's a fuckload of syrup all over the floor.
Randomize
