I almost didn't wake up for my first day of work. The 3rd bottle of champagne was a mistake. And the 2nd bottle of wine after that was probably excessive
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
I was doing the dishes wondering what was with all the tiny little cups, but then I remembered that some people drink things other than huge mixed drinks and big cups of water the next day.
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
i need to find a notary that isn't going to turn me in for blatantly lying to the us and chilean governments
You screamed at all of us and then showed us your sack. You're like the boyfriend of my dreams.
I borrowed a glass of wine. And the bottle. Your cat said it was ok
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
Remember that picture you sent me of you trying to eat the flower arrangement in the bathroom at that restaurant?
Who spent today in nothing but a vajazzle and candy thong? SORRY NOT SORRY
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
Just fantasized about my boss's fingers in a meeting. I desperately need to get some.
My one night stand asked me out to dinner. When he came to pick me up I got in the back seat. I thought he sent an uber. Awkward.
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
Just found a rebirth in peppermint schnapps. May be able to stay up all night and finish this paper after all. MERRY CHRISTMAS
Randomize
