It's like sexual therapy. We hooked up. And now were talking about our recent breakups.
Emoooo
We are brilliant. We call it the pint walk. Killing a pint of vodka while we walk from cleveland park to dupont. just making mama proud
Just wandered into a surprise final. Only a surprise for me though. I wish I could say this is the first time this has happened.
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
We just found a knife wedged in between the cushions on the couch you guys fucked on...why is this?
it was all good until he screamed "for fraaannnceee" on his last thrust
Apparently, I showed up wrapped in caution tape and immediately jumped on the stripper pole and started making very sexual gestures at the birthday girl. We lasted ten minutes.
How am I supposed to stop smoking pot when girl scout cookies are being sold.
Please collect your boy friend. He semi-passed out on the couch and trying to grab bums as people walk by. Anyone's bum, he's not choosy.
I cannot describe the pre-ejaculative horrors thru the medium of text messaging
He drunkenly stumbled over to me and told me my "crotch looks spectacular tonight"..... i think this could work
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
Oh man
I hooked up with the lead singer of the band at the wedding. I am so hungover.
I can't hangout tonight, I have a phone sex appointment at 10
Randomize
