I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
Yes, but it's not new to me. It's like every time a new guy finds out I'm a squirter it's a novelty so they make me squirt and squirt and squirt until their bed is completely soaked. And then afterwards they complain that there isn't a dry bit to sleep on. No shit Sherlock.
Priorities: waking up on your doorstep desperately clutching half a meatball marinara but with no sign of your keys, purse or housemate. Where are you?!
I'll just be here. Naked. Eating tots and jello like a muh fuggin G
Smoked before work and just remembered i left pringles in my desk last time i was high. SCORE
antibiotics and champagne: breakfast of champions
You came in last night, ate an entire avocado in silence, and then told me I should never accept rides from strangers. Not sure I even want to know what happened to you last night!
I believe in your delicious
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
Facebook just reminded me of the time I found two IHop cheese sticks in my hand bag. Those were the days.
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
I fucked her with a giant balloon tied to my dick. You tell ME how my night went
Randomize
