No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
It has come to my attention that I should apologize for myself and my friends
I just mixed tequila and nyquil in front of dad. hes making ambulance jokes but let me tell you its DELICIOUSSS
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
then he pulled down his pants, and i just stared for about a minute..... i was so confused. i didnt know my cat could have a bigger penis than an 18 year old man.
I got kicked out of an open bar wedding reception. The bride "felt threatened" by my presence. Not my fault she's ugly
I want to tell everyone I've ever met about how he him picking me up and fucking me against the wall was the highlight of my life. Worst lesbian ever.
Being in the club with your moms drunk friends > having a healthy relationship with your mom
I'm sorry about all of the innappropriate shoe throwing
I fell into a manhole last night, so there's that
Dude. I keep thinking about how I let a man gum my vagina.
I kept screaming that he looked like Khal Drogo and rode around the bar on his back.
This girl in my class is lecturing my professor about zombies. It has been going on for 15 minutes.
Zombies?
Zombies.
I'm covered in jizz and the toll booth lady knew it
This may sound strange but do you have my pants?
You tried to trade them for some girls skirt... So she has them...
Randomize
