i wonder if i could find a boyfriend who would call me big papa
sure if you go to prison
i stole $50 bucks from my girlfriends purse to pay for my other girls abortion pill...shes gonna be pissed
Semen is not good for contacts.
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
I am going to wait until he wakes up to set his couch on fire and then pee it out. That way he knows it was not an accident.
Oh my god. He likes it up the butt. But loves womanly support. Omg. Its bad. Its bad. Ive had too much whiskey for this to be ANYthing except bad.
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
can i text him and be like "oh yeah, forgot i kinda made out with a girl this weekend. For future reference, does this count as cheating?" ?
My phone just autocorrected 'vagina' to 'vaginihilation'...when exactly did I need to convey total annihilation by lady parts??
So I totally just used margarita salt for a body scrub.
They should incorporate dolphins into professional surfing
Everyone is out there getting real jobs and I just realized I've been "washing" my clothes with fabric softener for two months.
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
ps. i have two very important words to sum up my night
which are?
library sex.
Randomize
