she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
I'm not ok right now. I just walked in on a 600lb woman passed out on the toilet and she walked out and tried to eat her cell phone. I'm on acid I think.
I'm like connect-the-dots of drunk. Whiskey, bourbon, vodka, rum, gin. The hidden picture is me faceplanting.
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
Some chick just tried to plug her vodka into the wall.
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
Had sex and ran 2.8 miles all before 7:30am. This is going to be a very productive Monday.
Do I not have a Brazilian bc of my boyfriend situation or do I not have a boyfriend bc of my brazilian situation?
I can't promise that. They just put an extra shot in my margarita.
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
DELETE THAT VIDEO OF ME MAKING OUT WITH THAT RUG NOW
Bro I needs to be rescued in 30 mins...prfeebly someone died in a car accident needs to be the excuse
I just sold Adderall to a priest, im not quite sure how I feel about this situation
Where do you think black out memories go?
Into the dark abysmal abyss of the deepest, darkest part of your mind. It's obviously the bodies natural defense to protect you from witnessing the shit you do while actually blacked out.
Randomize
