Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
just took my temp. 103. i wonder how tylenol and jager bombs are gonna mix
just put an icicle in the bong. best/worst idea ever. i think i can taste global warming right now.
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
He puked on the grill while the burgers were on. We had to go to taco bell
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
I performed "get broken glass out of my shoulder" surgery last night... Drunk, with a what-a-burger straw.
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
So apparently blacked out me judges a man based on what type of dinosaur he would be...
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
DO I FUCKING *LOOK* LIKE SOMEONE WHO HAS THEIR ACT TOGETHER!?!? THE ANSWER IS "NO"!
How far are you from my house? Do I have time to masturbate before you get here?
I took advantage of the fact that my mentee had to go to the bathroom to throw up in the other stall. I'm going to hell for being hungover at an elementary school.
Its pretty bad when you can tell twins apart by the size of their penises...
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