I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
I just saw a hobo shake a payphone until it spat out a bunch of quarters. what a champ.
we'll hang out once this whole, "your friends are robbers and drug addicts" thing blows over with my parents.
How the hell am I supposed to know what lotion to get her? They should have a dressing booth where I could go test how good it is for jerking off, then I'd know.
did you seriously make the punch out of vodka and food coloring
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
hung over. covered in somebodies makeup. and ready to drink.
No but the chipped one is crooked now. Clearly I didn't use my hands to break my fall. I used my face
I'd feel sorry for him and his injury but it's an inconvenience for my vagina
It's called the eyeliner-blowjob correlation, read a science book bro
I should start printing out disclaimer handouts and passing them out to people saying, "I can not be held responsible for anything I say or do this evening."
Everyone was passed out so I turned off the lights and locked all the doors. I also took the chicken sandwich in the microwave as payment.
I ended up in th ER yelling my height weight and age
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
Randomize
