i took an adderall last night to write a paper. i ended up watching 7 hours of roseanne and couldn't look away
Now she's making me sit here and look at pictures of guys she likes who look like bears. She's calling them her bear friends.
I got lit on fire and andy went to jail last night. Totally unrelated incidents though.
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
you should be awarded for your promiscuity.
i really should.
OH FOR FUCKS SAKE! SOMEONE TOOK ME FOR A GODDAMN PROSTITUTE!! IM WEARING LEG WARMERS!!! THAT IS LIKE THE LEAST HOOKERISH THING TO WEAR!
Honestly I'm not even that excited to see my boyfriend. I'm more excited to see his penis. His penis inside of me.
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
I want to just live in between your butt cheeks.
he went down on me to a drake song and now i think i need a penicillin shot
Have fun in Vegas! Be safe, use condoms, and take a pic of Jon beforehand to give out when he goes missing. It will help the police.
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
I'm not talking about Donald Trump in the midst of sending you nudes
I should not be able to sum up my life with a taco brand motto...
Apparently i'm now known as the kid who was double fisting tequila and pedialyte.
Randomize
