His internet history had "Disney Porn" on it.
that shit musta been laced I laughed for two hours and everyone looked like penguins
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
Oh, I made pasta salad in the throw up bowl. I hope you don't need that for the next few days.
Europeans suck. I just gave him head and somehow i am the one paying for the coffee
IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.
Change of plans. Theres a bouncy castle setup in my apartment complex.
A pack of naked men just sprinted down the street screaming in German. It's 5 AM.
And on that day, Satan said; "Let there be the friend zone and let us get fucking high." while Jesus silently cried in the background.
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
Also, I found your gauge.
I found it under my pillow like a gift from the Sex Fairy.
Just used the "Buddy" Poppy flower I got from a veteran to clean my one hitter. "I'm proud to be an American"
Def don't remember taking those pics I sent you...but it looks like I was in a car? Shit. Looks like my Uber passenger rating just went up exponentially.
It true. It written in the Bible.
Yes I remember that, right next to the passage where jesus said unto his disciples, pop molly, fuck bitches amen
I mean there are real risks associated with having unprotected sex, but I don’t think I need to worry about a ghost possessing me and having unprotected sex while using my body
Randomize