No, drunk sperm still make babies.
Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
sitting in an airport in detroit. just saw a commercial for detroit tourism with kid rock as a spokesman. reason # 1458 to never visit this city.
Me + Nice restaurant + Copious amounts of booze + obscene comments to couples = valentine's day plans
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
because you can't take the autistic girl you're babysitting on a blunt ride.
I was just "that girl you seen blowing some dude outside when you drove by"
Sometimes you have a life bucket list item checked off like 4 tits in your face simultaneously and getting to bang them both. I'm sorry I bailed on skiing but not really. Coming over with a boombox playing 'heat of the moment' as soon as I can hail a cab cause I'm too drunk to drive still...
Why are you there anyways?
Pickin up ball pit balls from craigslist
The more I think about it, the more convinced I am that I'm the solution to all of T-Swift's guy problems.
ill be home in an hour. Be in my bed ready for disappointment
I'm killing it this week, I've peed my pants and put my vibrator into the washing machine.
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
If I hear that song one more time I will drive to hell and make John Lennon eat my ass.
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