I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
I woke up with $100 in my pocket and I was so excited until I found an atm receipt for a $500 withdrawal. Not as exciting.
reaaaally cool. my cat ate my birth control.
woke up this morning with a big mac and chips on a plate, coke in a glass and a knife and fork AND NAPKIN waiting for me in front of my computer. PORN WAS ALREADY PLAYING. I LOVE DRUNK ME
I mean it's not my fault he had a floor mat that read "put out or get out". What was I supposed to do?
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
I am lonely and I want to touch your beard
We shot off some fireworks at 12 and then I orchestrated the group singing of god bless the USA all while wearing a don't tread on me flag as a cape. I repped hard.
Passed out drunk in a tanning bed...
Did At The Beach call the fire department to get you like last time?
I just imagined myself as R2-D2 and you as C3P0 walking around the Vegas desert looking for alcohol
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
...blackout vacation is awesome. Where did you end up? I think i'm in Miami.
Hospital.
Randomize
