i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
It's kind of sad that your greatest accomplishment today is that you stood up and didn't fall down.
My mom is helping me re-arrange my room to make New Year's more hook-up friendly
I was asking the bouncer, "if I fall will you catch me?" which then turned into "if I jump off the roof will you catch me?" He said no.
My mom now keeps ice cubes on hand for my bong water. We may be able to work this relationship out.
Hey, umm this is awkward but I want to apologize in case you find gum in your pubes. Not sure if I swallowed it or spit it out. It's all a blur.
BRING ME THE PLAN B. ILL GIVE YOU A FREE WATER BOTTLE AND A BUMPER STICKER AND SOME BACON BITS
Trial is expected to last a fucking week if I get chosen.
To be fair, you are the kind of person I want to be on the jury when I inevitably end up in front of one.
I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
I'm so high that a guy on TV just sneezed and I said "bless you."
Randomize
