So random guy from last night came over tonight. I told myself I wasn't going to sleep with him but he had some killer dirty talk and a big penis in his arsenal...what was I supposed to do? Supposedly he lost his virginity to his wife and since their divorce a year ago I'm the 1st girl he's slept with, I feel like I just re-took his virginity...I feel like a rockstar.
Getting pregnant off pre-cum is like getting high off erasers
He is passed out on the kitchen floor. He will fight you if you disturb him. Just a warning.
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
just found glitter in my belly button...seriously when will this nightmare end
I just had some guy offer to eat me out on my lunch break... I think single life is getting better everyday
I'm covered in sharpie and the girl next to me just said something smells like fried food. Hint: it's me. Why am I in class?
Male strippers are involved. You are coming
Well just watched a guy puke in a trash can then proceed to pick pizza outta said trash can and eat it
I should make a collage of all the pictures of me caught doing slutty things
Yeah i just finished watching someone play ping pong with his penis it didn't fully register until after a few seconds
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
He gives me the same feeling I get when someone puts a margarita or German chocolate cake in front of me
I share a birthday weekend with Easter this year, so that fucking sucks. I hate sharing...and I have to share with fucking Jesus this year.\n
There is this guy in here. He didn't even get ice cream he just filled up his cup with mini marshmellows, chocolate syrup, about a lb of grahm cracker crumbs and walked around to everyone in the shop saying "hey, hey look here, I just made fucking s'mores." He was SO proud of himself.
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