Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
My number went up to seventeen today. I forgot to add my random hookup on a sailboat.
He just washed his hands with scrubbing bubbles yelling "They work hard so I don't have to!"
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
I was greeting people at my door feeding them jello shots out of an ice cube tray with a spoon.
I just found a GIANT thermos of sangria in my sink. I don't know if its still good to drink, but its good to drink.
do you find it slutty that the last person I had sex with is also the person who sings my ringtone ?
he asked me to "shake his dick" when he introduced himself, playing naked football with you in our living room. $100 says you two get married one day.
its 2pm. u awake yet?
ill text u back later. still peeling fingernail polish off my face.
It was technically 11... But I go by McDonald's time, if they aren't servin breakfast, it's the afternoon. Therefore I can drink
I need to stop getting high and watching documentaries. Wanna go to Japan with me and protest the mass genocide of dolphins?
I had to get my boss birth control a work today. I knew going to ASU would come in handy in my career someday.
I might volunteer to give breath samples on the 17th where I would be required to get drunk and then give samples! THE POLICE WOULD PAY ME AND PROVIDE THE ALCOHOL!
honestly, you deserve someone taller anyways
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
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