I specifically asked you not to be slutty tonight.
well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
he just tried to lick my eyebrow. thats the deal breaker.
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
Hey fuck you and your taint. I'm just riding a canoe called life, back the fuck off. P.s. I need a ride
We're in ER. He's high on morphine and I'm drunk. Gonna score some bed pans for jello shots.
Why do they give me cups on $8 pitcher night? I HAVE A PITCHER.
You almost set me on fire last night.
You probably deserved it.
This is why I need to move out...so my naked vomit covered walk of shames to the bathroom are only witnessed by one other person who is equally as pathetic as me and the cat
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
We got really excited for country fried steak then we had sex.
I'll text you when I have a mental breakdown about it.
Please do.
They don't really make a "hey I'm fucking your ex wife" card do they ?
Randomize
