i'm starting to get pissed at how pandora is trying to force coldplay on me
we got back to my place and he started talking about feelings. i politely told him to leave and that he managed to cock block himself.
Just met a guy who has been in college for 7 years and still classified as a junior. Then watched him shotgun 10 beers. Found my new hero
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
I can't believe you made out with me with a french fry in your mouth.
im gonna put my furry chinchilla vagina on her mother effing nose
He had the smallest penis i'd ever seen. I can see why he drinks his life away.
Hey guy that stepped on my foot, don't slap my ass to apologize.
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
I was like kind of drunk but mostly just very enthusiastic about beyonce
Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
Then, right before he came he said "I want to buy you so many things!" What the fuck?!
Serious question: does drunken cyber sex with a stranger on omegle count as cheating???
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
I wrote life affirmations on my notes to repeat and read several times a day so I become a better person, see the time on the toilet has been constructive
Randomize
