what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
I wish you were here to vomit in your hand.
had no condoms so I just made do with an empty doritos bag.
I just threw up while getting a haircut. I'm never trying to accomplish stuff with a hangover again.
My grandma paid her handyman in pain killers. I now know why this is in my genes
At least he's not married... I hate Halloween hookups
The good news is I managed to avoid the three cop car looking for me. The bad news is I no longer have shoes.
You were crying and asking his mom "why doesn't he like road head?"
You sent me a cat video and you screaming drunkenly in my background
Just dodged a state trooper, your weed will be there shortly. Fear the unbustable!
it's not like I want to die, I just want life to stop for a little bit. how does that work?
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
Fire trucks are here again. It wasn't me this time.
Ok, not to minimize the significance of that beautiful anecdote from your childhood, but here's a video of my penis.
Not only is he funny, he had a REALLY big dick
He's old enough to be your father!
REALLY. BIG. DICK.
Randomize
