That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
you have to choose: penises or morals?
another holiday season passes without receiving a dick in a box, where did i go wrong in life?
...he tried to burn down someone's house once. ABORT ABORT ABORT
You said that about some fat chick sitting on the base of a lamp post and puking. Downright heroic.
will you please stage a drunk girl intervention and tell him that his chain is severely harming his chances of getting laid tonight?
hooked up with the gay kid & his friend's mom told me "you know he has a identical twin brother whose straight, right?"
No. I heard a cover of "my heart will go on". This is not sanity.
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
The moment I said this burrito on my nuts feels really good is the moment I knew I was drunk
I can insert a female catheter, but I cannot grill a cheese.
So I'm trying to figure out how to talk my boss into allowing pajama day once a week. Any ideas?
I have no regard for my liver, you should know this.
He got mad at you last time bc you tried to rap battle him via text. This is strictly business.
I’m good. I learned that a guy ate the mushrooms that were growing out of his toilet, so there’s that.
Randomize
