I'm at his house. He has VELCRO shoes. I'm too desperate to leave...I may need help in thee life dept
aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
I just turned in a 4 page paper spelling absolute as "absolut" every single time. I'm an alcoholic
i kept telling her phones are not food, and she countinued to put it in her mouth..
The UPD just told me that he was going to call the cops if i try to run. you owe me 5 dollars, i told u they arn't real cops
please promise me that no matter what happens you will keep me away from the children
when was she peeing in the stairwell? why dont i remember this?
....because generally we only remember 40% of the night each, and have to fill eachother in. And that still leaves 20% that we will never know and its probably for the best
I just let my hand run under cold water for five minutes. I couldn't stop staring at it and the only things I could think about were how amazing it felt, how cool water was, and what a wonderful world it is that we live in. Reasons why I don't smoke...
Katie told the cabby "when the boat docks I'm getting off with you"
Judging by your snapchat you're totally working on your project and definitely not singing, "The Sign" while shirtless with another man.
The staples of my diet are Labatt Blue, Xanax, and brick cheese.
I should have never moved out...
I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea
I have 3 bottles of vodka in my room telling me not to go to work tomorrow.
Her tits are so fantastic they gave him a panic attack.
My vagina is the only part of me that is pleased you lived through last night.
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