to do: lose virginity to hamster dance
feel weird hangin out with you now that i've eaten your sister out
I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
Single handedly the worst sex I've ever had just went down. Its like we both laid there after word-less thinking about the other " could they be any worse in bed" ?
At a Jewish lesbian wedding. I stick out like a sore, uncircumcised penis.
Somewhere between catching the stove on fire and not being aware of it being on fire while I'm in the living room. I drank too much.
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
I barely even remember him. He is just a distant beard in my past.
He used Kanye West lyrics to justify what happened and I accepted his logic
woke up with empty beer can still duct taped into my fists and the word "dove" written on the back of my neck
Why did you load my phone up with pics of Al Gore?
It's not vacation until I get called "disgustinly sexy" by an fat woman whose older than my mother.
I FUCKED WHEELCHAIR DUDE
HE'S INTO WEIRD SHIT
GOOD KIND OF WEIRD SHIT
If she didn't block me, she would have known that I sneezed on her toothbrush.
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