You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
it was like brushing your tongue but with a fucking long toothbrush.
Had a speaker in class today. She asked whats the first question when you see someone pregnant. I said whos the father? She was looking for "is it a boy or a girl?"
He said to me this morning that we should finish these beers, go and get plan B then on the way back, go to the pub to celebrate the death of our baby. I love Manchester.
Yeah well tell that to drunk me. She seems to have no standards or gender preference.
Sharing a bathroom with a guy sucks. I always have to set an alarm for the middle of the night just so I can take a dump. Poop text btw
Wait, you seriously DON'T keep vodka in your backpack??!??!?
Just peed in the fountain while its snowing. Fell flat on my ass, literally my butt naked ass in a pile of snow. It's safe to say I'm done with drinking on weekdays
She jumped on a table and took off her shirt and started yelling things that no one understood. For being 3, she has a dead on impression of a drunk party girl.
You shut your whore mouth, we don't talk about Drunk Nutella night.
Im showing up stoned and in sweatpants. Because that is where im at in life right now. Sorry not sorry.
Just spilled beer all over my bed. Should cut myself off, but instead I just took my shirt off and used it as a towel.
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
Apparently the girl he banged in the bathroom yelled at him for hitting on me all night. But whatever, he was holding her hand for most of it
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