If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
you know you made it when your beer pong table is made from imported italian hardwood
I was blowdrying my hair this morning and I swear to god it smelled like franzia
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
He's spent his last 3 years working at Urban Outfitters. No, I'm not sad I missed out on a life of mustaches, the dollar menu and shitty scarves.
I'll throw in a blow job for your kind ways. Or another booty call. I'm poor and not very imaginative. This is all I have to offer- the unicorn like wonders of my vagina.
I think I actually have rug burn on my eye.
If only we could all 3 say fuck school to be stoner flight attendants
The thing is that despite the high paying career and the increased responsibility, my life hasn't changed that much. Only instead of blacking out on $2 wells at some dive I blackout on top shelf martinis in a suit. Oh and only on Fri & Sat nights. Being 30 doesn't suck as bad as everyone led me to believe.
I wish my brain had a "congrats you just defeated the munchies" notification!
He came for an unexpected visit and let's just say I shattered his illusion that girls don't watch porn
I just saw a bunch of drunk old guys riding on the side of a modified old fire truck yelling at cars and smoking while they looked for parking...promise we will be just like them when we grow up?
I'm craigslisting fire trucks as we speak
I've officially slept through a hurricane, a tornado and had sex during an earthquake. I'm surviving.
I want you to worship my cock.
That's not how you start a conversation.
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