Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
So she started giving everyone lap dances, and i was like "i think i like this chick"
Why does it always sting when I'm breaking the seal taking a piss?
b/c u have herpes
No i said "always", not "since 2003" Asshole.
No way. Our relationship is based solely on texting and sex. A phone call would be too much at this point.
is it sad that I can recall my outfits by who took them off?
i don't know. but im upstairs in the closet with a burger i found in their fridge
Our sex has gotten so much better since we broke up.
I'm off the liquor
You're forefathers are ashamed of you. They didn't struggle to make it to America so that you could become a soft dick
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
No. Mother. Fucking. Jello shots. Just no. I'm not falling into that trap again.
If I don't have the money by then, I'll pay you in sex.
It's going to be 23.5 times of sex and 19 blow jobs. I just googled it.
He's so urbane and sleek; so aesthetically chiseled, having endless features to offer me whenever I desire.
Are you fucking a guy or a condo building?
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
So none of you told me my tits were popping out of my shirt for three hours?
We told you. Repeatedly. You said you made it look good.
I need to bang the neighbor boy. He’s given three women screaming orgasms this week alone.
Also, my apartment walls are too thin
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