I'll collect that couch/porn sloopy beedge tomorrow just FYI
You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
Just figured out why my bed smells like weed: I just found a bowl in my pillow case?
His dick was as big as my arm. Giving him a handjob was like giving someone an Indian sunburn.
I woke up with my left arm looking like it got mauled by a lion. Oo and she said someone broke her car window.
Just realized these events may be related.
I should have but it might be too early in this fuckbuddyship to emasculate him
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
I think that last shot was nyquil. Please come gte me. WINGS.
Tomorrow may or may not be a problem cause i'll be wonder woman for a halloween party aka i'll be fucked up & try & jump off of shit thinking i can fly
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
So you're at your daughter's volleyball game looking at dicks online? That's amazing.
No, I was picking her up from volleyball and sitting in my car looking at dicks.
Come over here. Bongs and porn. I found the promised land
Randomize
