I won a flip cup tournbment! Why is boot and rally so hard when youre old?
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
Don't bother coming over to clean the mess. I already paid two kids 5 bucks for it, just didn't tell them you peed all over the place. You do owe me 5 bucks though
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
They ran out of toilet paper, so I had a girl rip down the streamers so I could wipe.
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
did you just try to prove your straightness by quoting a lady gaga song?
Is it sad or funny that I just bought two pregnancy test at the dollar store to give away to people on New Year's Eve while driving for Uber.
His mom let me come to his house for a Booty call at 4am. She even cooked us breakfast in the morning and told me im a better moaner than his girlfriend of 4yrs.
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
I woke up uncovered, spread eagled to my dad saying "you really need to stop sleeping naked."
The squirrels were at the front door. Dude I swear..
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