She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
As soon as he lost the election, the reception's open bar became a cash bar. I have never been so disappointed in my countrymen.
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
currently pooping in a public restroom while drinking free beer. there has never been a finer line between awesome and depressing.
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
I had phone sex with a retiree last night. This is not how I envisioned my 20s going...
The front camera on the 5S is SO much better. This is great development for my international sexting.
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
I can't tell if my roommate is crying or having sex and the fact that there's anime in the background is only making this more confusing
He struggled for a second trying to unhook my bra and I said "4/10. Novice."
She wanted to get out of there before you guys woke up so she wouldn't let me find my underwear. Lol So I apologize to whoever finds that in your room.
I just thought you should know... Instead of a glass of wine before bed I am having a few shots of 1800. This is what being a night shift nurse will do to you... Standing in your kitchen in your undies doing shots
It’s a 10 inch dick! Of course I’m getting a Brazilian
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