I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems
My vagina has officially become a vortex for sexually confused frat guys.
all they had in the fridge was rum and filled water balloons
This is the last weekend of getting drunk and having sex all nite with the plumber. I'm exhausted all weekend and I'm never going to finish the remodel at this rate
Whiskey + Water + Crystal Lite does NOT = refreshing summer time drink.....
I'm like the Mother Theresa of booty calls.
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
When you get here, kick me in the balls. It's really important. - I'll explain later.
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
Best walk of shame ever. Wearing a bright purple onesie, covered in smudged childrens make up, carrying my shoes and 1/4 sac of goon. I swear every house I walked past had an elderly couple watering their garden just to watch me
All I remember is sitting on your kitchen floor and playing with a banana like it was a viking ship.
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
Next thing I know her tits are out on my desk. It was straight out of a porno. What was I supposed to do I’m not made of stone
the weird part wasn't waking up in someone else's underwear, it was how the cat was staring at me like he knew more about last night then i remembered.
Randomize